THE BAG!

THE BAG!

Wow, what a week.  Classes started.  Hello, distractions! Hello, stress! Hello, homework!   We have, among our team members, a few future nurses who need to learn a lot of things while they are “nurses in training’.  Bus rides can be a time where they love to work on perfecting their techniques!  I am glad they had their stethoscopes and blood pressure cuffs on the bus practicing on us on our way to Trine instead of their needles! 

We also are down to one practice a day and it never seems like we have enough time to get done the things we need to work on.  I struggle as a coach to plan quality practices without rushing through things so we can get more accomplished. 

This week has been tough for me, if I am going to be completely honest.  I think the craziness of the past two weeks finally has caught up to me and reached a boiling point yesterday when I spent about 5 hours of my time trying to trouble-shoot downloading our match film to the website that we are working with to share film.  I was on the phone for about 2 hours and nothing seemed to be working.  I had several things on my list I had to get done and they just didn’t get done.  I knew I was tired and frustrated.  I knew it wasn’t good when I had a reporter call me and I broke down with emotion when talking about our seniors and how much they have grown over their four years at Calvin.  I knew it wasn’t good when I got quite emotional with my AD about something that normally don’t allow myself to get upset over.  And I knew it wasn’t good when I broke down when I called friend for a recipe and she asked me if I had a cold and if I was alright.  I don’t think I am an above average emotional person.  It was then that I decided to resign.  I just didn’t think I could do this job anymore.  Sometimes it just seems too hard and not worth it.    

Now, according to my husband, Mark, this is the normal time of the year that he annually hears about my “resignation”.  And according to him, it is going to happen about two more times during the season.  He seems to always be there to pick me up and tell me that a little extra sleep and perspective is what I need most.  And he is always right.  

So today I woke up feeling a lot better with a lot better perspective and feeling a little silly about resigning yesterday J  I was excited because it was GAME DAY…at least excited most of the day.  Game day for me is a mixed bag.  I go from excited to nervous to fighting feelings of not being in control and it cycles back again over and over throughout the whole day.  So by now, you are probably wondering what is with the title of this post. 

The bus pulled away from Van Noord Fieldhouse and all of a sudden, Kelly (one of our senior captains) was addressing me and telling me how much they appreciate what I do for the team and how much they love me.  Then, she pulls out this coaching bag that they bought me.  They had known I found this special coaching bag that was a wee bit out of my price range to buy and without me knowing, they bought it for me.  Well, guess what happened….. I broke down and cried, AGAIN.  They were so excited to give it to me and I was so overwhelmed by the gesture (don’t get me wrong—I LOVE the bag but this isn’t really about THE BAG) that I broke down again because they made me feel so special. And it was exactly something that affirmed I am in the vocation I am meant to be in.   It is incredible how God’s timing on little things like this remind me of how much He is in control and I know, without a doubt, that He is leading me and calling me to a vocation that is not meant for the weak of heart.  Coaching is not easy, extremely rewarding, undoubtedly a roller coaster of emotions, frustrating, and sometimes one of the best and worst things one could ever experience in a job. 

Now for those of you that don’t know me, I hope you are not thinking “wow, this coach must be crazy”.  I am usually not that emotional….passionate, ALWAYS.  But….I actually don’t cry that often.  But, as Jimmy Valvano said “If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that’s a full day.  That is a heck of a day”.  Well I have had a heck of a ride with these women since August 19 and it has been filled with about every emotion you can think of.  And I am so thankful for that.  And I am so thankful for them.   And I LOVE my new coaching bag!  Thank you Calvin Volleyball Team J

Coach Amber Warners